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Letter" 'Young and privileged' didn't need lecture

Published 11:39 am, Friday, December 6, 2013
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To the officer on the scene of my recent car accident in Westport:

You arrived on scene, and I was on the phone with my insurance carrier. You spoke to the other driver first, and then I patiently waited to tell my side of the story.

When my turn came, I was expecting you would hear what I had to say the same as you heard what the other driver said. Sadly, every time I tried to tell you, you would say, "No, that's not what happened; you were trying to push your way into the lane and you hit him."

I tried multiple times to tell you how I was being pushed into oncoming traffic by the other driver. You interrupted every time to tell me I was wrong.

At one point, you said to me: "Sometimes when you're young and privileged from Westport, you feel everyone should be nice to you, and things should be the way you want them. But that's not how the real world works. In the real world, people are not always nice to you, and that's a lesson you need to learn."

As for being "young and privileged," I'll say this: I carry my age well. People often mistakenly think I'm in my 20s. I take after my mother. The secret to youthfulness is in our blood. I am 41 but feel 20. As for being privileged, I am proud to say I am. I am privileged to have had 11 life-saving surgeries in 10 years. I am privileged to have survived after my doctor sat at my bedside 11 years ago and asked me if I believed in prayer because there was nothing left they could do for me. I am privileged to have been blessed with the most amazing daughter. I am privileged that my father, who is battling stage 4 non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, is still alive 10 years later. I am privileged to have a role in the lives of my twin nephews, both of whom have special needs. I am privileged to be healthy enough to work seven days a week while I build my name as a special-education advocate.

So yes! I am young and privileged.

And learning there are mean people in the world? Well, I am aware people will lie, cheat and judge others. I was reminded of this the day of the accident.

The outcome is up to the insurance companies. Whatever it may be, I will accept any role they determine I played in the accident. I don't expect anything to change from this letter. I don't expect the other driver to come forward and tell the truth. I don't expect you to acknowledge the things you said. Instead, I will pray for the universe to send you both all the love and healing you need for whatever wounds you may bear.

Truly young and privileged,

Faith Filiault

Wilton